An unexpected and slightly uncomfortable phenomenon has overshadowed me for the last couple of years..as a complementary therapist, I went from knowing what my calling in life was, to suddenly finding that all the enthusiasm and passion had disappeared. I no longer felt motivated to offer healing treatments, which had for a long time been such an important part of my own sense of purpose. This was confusing, dismaying and left me feeling directionless, without a purpose in life.
It started with a growing awareness in quiet moments that what I was doing no longer felt fulfilling to me. It could be that I just needed to take a break and refresh my perspective on things. But I also sensed at a deeper level that this felt more like something in my being was in transition, evolving. It felt like it was time to explore new experiences, investigate the deeper meaning of life.
The wisdom I was following said that in order to find true fulfilment in life, find your passion and follow it - follow your joy. The reason for this is because your passion and joy are powered by intention, attention and motivation - all of which provide the powerhouse leading to that sense of fulfilment.
Always one to be curious about life and to embrace new ideas, I set myself on a quest to follow the direction of my attention, my passion and joy to find out where it was leading me.
I was becoming more aware that everything is energy in some form or another, so the key to health, well being and happiness must lie with understanding and managing our own personal energy and how we relate to everything in our environment.
I felt strongly drawn to take part in a 'Sacred Chants and Shamanic Wisdom' expedition in Peru that came to my attention. Shamanism is an ancient healing tradition and moreover, a way of life. It is a way to connect with nature and all of creation. One of the key aspects of Shamanic wisdom is the use of 'energy medicine'. The shamans throughout the ages knew how to heal using a holistic approach long before what they were doing could be explained by science. They knew how to live in harmony with the natural environment and how important it is to do so. We are all part of the same ecosystem; disrupt one part and there is a knock on effect to the other parts. So I took up this opportunity and had the most amazing, heart opening, inspiring time that I feel has shifted my energy and opened my awareness in a very positive way.
Each day we were taking part in sacred ceremony which honoured the earth, sky, all four directions, ourselves and all the creatures that live upon this earth. We were consciously deciding what within ourselves we were ready to let go of, that was not serving us well and what healthy states of being we would like to welcome in. The process was deeply cathartic, very moving and felt very liberating.
Each day we were also taking part in sacred chants and mantra concerts. Jonathan Goldman, in his book Healing Sounds, talks about a formula for sound healing: Intention + Frequency = Healing. When a person sings mantras, the essence of their entire vibration is contained in the sound and acts like a homeopathic remedy to the group and even to the world. The frequency of sound moves in concentric circles out from its origin and affects the vibration of anyone in the field. Chanting mantras stimulates the endocrine system; the act of your tongue pressing against the palate of the mouth stimulates the hypothalamus, thalamus, and pituitary. This vibration releases chemical hormones that balance the body and have healing effects. All sound has an effect on your molecular structure.
How could one fail to be affected positively by this week of what I can only describe as blissful experience? The content was a wonderful fusion of wisdom and experiences from the ancient tribes of the Amazon and the mantras of the Hindu Vedic tradition. Both traditions acknowledge that to maintain health and well being, we need to engage with the more subtler energies within us and around us. This was just what I had been becoming aware of for the past year; that energy medicine is the key to the future health and wholeness of every living being, creature and the natural world on this planet.
Later in the summer I also felt drawn to take some time living 'off grid' at the Lammas eco village in West Wales. My whole being seemed to yearn for more connection with the natural world, the opportunity to live closer to nature; I knew that such moments in the past had filled me with such a joy to be alive that this must be very important to my physical and emotional well being.
During my time there, I worked on the land, contributed and felt part of a community and took part in an amazing full moon campfire music jam. All of this experience was speaking to me very strongly about the sort of environment, activities and people that make my heart sing and feed my soul. The physical and mental effect on my body was noticeable - I felt energised, inspired and buzzing with joy.
As the summer drew to a close, I felt a glow of inspiration that perhaps West Wales could be my spiritual home and somewhere I would want to be living.
Then the fear and doubt crept in! What if.. what if.. what if... my balloon of happiness felt quite deflated! Yet the option to do nothing and stay in my present home, surrounded by buildings, roads, cars, traffic also feels untenable. So one thing I do know for certain; to nourish and give sustenance to my body and being, my dearest wish is to live in a more rural, less congested environment, connect more with like minded people and I intend to make that happen.
West Wales is a long way from my own family, I have many moments of wondering whether I am crazy to be even contemplating such a move and yet I also know I have to be true to my own heart in order to live the most fulfilling life.
So until I can see my way forward clearly, I am staying focused on the kind of environment, home, life and community I would like for myself and look for all the opportunities in the present to experience that joyfulness. I am also happy to find that my passion for helping people to feel better and heal has returned. Sometimes you have to go away from something in order to come back more fully appreciating its value and able to bring a new depth to the experience. I feel that there will be new services to offer in the future and that my healing work can have more depth and creativity now.
I also keep on preparing and clearing my home for a move. Past experience has shown me that if I continue to mentally 'cast my net out' in terms of research, enquiries and testing things out, sooner or later the solution will appear. It is a fact of quantum physics that what you put your attention on most frequently and clearly will manifest in your physical reality (don't take my word for it, check it out).
Deepak Chopra talks about how 'the brain strengthens or weakens in specific areas depending on the input it receives, and paying attention provides concentrated input'. He also said that there are some basic requirements to be met. The first is being centred as distraction is self-defeating. Secondly, awareness focuses naturally when you have a desire; we focus on what we want. Thirdly, attention works best when combined with intention – envisioning a way to fulfil your desire. When the three ingredients come together – you are centred, you have a desire, you intend to fulfil your desire – attention becomes extremely powerful.
Then your reticular activating system can get to work finding the answer to your desire and intention..whaat?? I hear you say! The RAS as it is also known is the part of your brain that takes what you focus on most (i.e. what you have told it is important to you) and creates a filter for it. So that out of the trillions of pieces of information that it filters every day, it only presents to your conscious mind the bits important to you. Pretty cool huh?! That is why when you buy a new car, you suddenly see all the other cars on the road that are the same as yours. Or why you can tune out a noisy room of people, but hear your own name being called.
Once you know this, you can begin to consciously influence your RAS to find what you are looking for. There is a way to consciously influence your reality, when you stay focused on what you desire for yourself. Lynne McTaggart, best selling author and renowned authority on the power of Intention advises that there are a number of factors that will give your intentions the best chance of success; practise staying focused, be specific in what you are asking for, mentally rehearse & visualise the outcome with all of your five senses, believe in the process, keep firmly fixed in your mind your desired outcome and stay positive. Then move aside and let the universe sort it out.
All of this scientific research and knowledge gives me reassurance that I really can be master of my destiny if I follow the principles outlined above. In my own experience, it is very important not to be swayed or negatively influenced by the seeming impossibility of your intention, or the absence of a visible solution. The Universe really does move in mysterious ways and many seemingly impossible situations have resolved themselves quite unexpectedly when there is a strong enough desire for something. And in the meantime it is very important to focus on the positives in the present situation and the joys, of which there are many to be found if you but look!
I hope you can see some parallels in my story applicable in your own life and that it may help you to review any changes you would like to make to stay true to your own sense of purpose. Go well, be happy, love life.
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